Don't Be Held Back

"We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed."  2 Corinthians 4:8-9

Have you ever encountered a situation that made free climbing El Capitan actually look easy?  I believe we all have at some point in our lives.  Just as the case of the climber, in the photo, there are plenty of odds that is ready to defeat him: gravity, a loose hold ready to break away, no ropes for protection.  Plenty of adversity here to keep him from reaching the top.  That feeling sound familiar?

In light of these situations, Paul encourages us with his words that, even when everything seems against you, God will get you through it.  Satan works in many ways to try to defeat us, make us give up, and take his "easy road".  God continues to say, "Don't give up!  I AM here!  I'll get you through it!"  Keeping that focus and faith on our Creator, and we can get through anything.  The important thing is to keep moving upward.  If someone attempts to hold you back, spiritually, let them go.  As 1 Corinthians 15:33 states, "Do not be deceived: 'Bad company ruins good morals'."  If there is something tying you down, look to God to break free, as surely as He broke the chains from Peter's wrists (Acts 12:6-7).

While I don't see myself climbing a sheer face as El Capitan, I am determined to continue to scale the mountains that life sets in front of me.  Not only myself but, for my family to keep pushing forward, as well.  What mountains are you facing?  Keep moving forward, God will get you through it, and you will be that much stronger.

"And the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will Himself restore you and make you strong, firm, and steadfast."  1 Peter 5:10

A Treasured Jewel - A Shout to the Husbands

"Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them."  Colossians 3:19


Hey guys, (ladies, by all means follow along, as well) have you been guilty of putting your foot in your mouth?  Have you said or done something, whether purposely or not, that gave such a look from your wife that you said to you was everything short of loving?  Guilty, as charged!  

Having a disagreement is bad enough.  You add stubbornness, shouting, and harsh language; now you have a much larger issue.  It turned from a conversation to a fighting match.  You could almost hear the bell ring for Round 1 to end and Round 2 to begin.  Where did the love in that conversation cease to exist?  Even more, you just pushed aside God, the guide to yours and your wife's marriage.

1 Peter 3:7 states, "Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you in the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers."  I love the King James Version using the phrase "giving honor to the wife". Honor - giving tribute, high respect, great esteem.  My wife definitely deserves my highest esteem.  She has achieved remarkable goals in her personal life, as well as rising up in a "man's world" business.  I wouldn't tell her about that "weaker partner" bit.  She'd just give you a "Whatchoo talkin' 'bout, Willis?" look.  I haven't done a very good job of giving that honor to this remarkable creature that God put into my life.  Have you found yourself in that situation?  Yeahhhhh, time to eat crow, fellas!

Our wives are so much more to us.  We found them (wives could say the same about their husbands) as the diamond in the rough.  A rare treasure.  A sparkling jewel.  For God to bring this one true soul into your life is a precious gift from the Father.  Nothing less.  Scripture continues to tell us to love our wives as we love our own bodies; if we love our wife, we love ourselves. (Ephesians 5:28).  I can clearly (and shamefully) say that those moments that I was not being loving to my wife, I was failing to love myself.  I get more angered at myself and it pours out at those times.  Not a blessed highlight of a husband.  My wife has seen me at my best.  She has also seen me more beat and broken down than any family or friend.  She hasn't stopped loving me and supporting me because of it.  She deserves nothing less.  All of our wives deserve nothing less than our full love and support in them.

The bible gives us several more messages and guidance to being proper husbands.  I have had to go back to those passages and re-enter them into my heart, when I fall short of what He expects of me, and what my wife should be able to expect out of me.  

One of my favorite songs by Alabama, is called "The Maker Said Take Her".  That line continues: "and love her forever.  Take care of her for life and treat her right."  Husbands, treat your wives right.  Even when you royally screw up, show her that you love her, don't be afraid to apologize, and embrace her.  Help her to feel like the treasured jewel that she is, sparkling in love and affection.  Remember, she is a rare gift, not to be taken for granted.

A Feather In The Wind

“A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.” Proverbs 16:9


Any "Forrest Gump" fans?  I love this movie for the simple lesson that it teaches.  This lesson comes at the beginning and end of the movie.  Remember that feather that you see, been pushed and tossed in whatever direction the winds takes it?  That defines the title character of this movie.  Forrest did not attempt to control his own destiny.  He went with the flow.  Whenever someone suggested that he do something, for merely said, "Okay", and off he went.  No hesitation or questions.  He just did it.

That should be how we respond to God's guidance.  Just go and do it.  How often do we try to question His choices for us?  How many times do we try to outthink God?  We know what direction we need to go, right?  Anybody?  Bueller?...….Bueller?

Proverbs 3:5 answers by stating: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.”  Who will direct us?  God!  He is our Shepherd.  What does that make us?  His sheep!  Like sheep, we will wander off, get lost, or caught in some sort of trap; being unable to find our own way back or, get ourselves free.  We need to trust in God's plan.

What in your life is bigger than God's purpose for you?  I want to clear the air, about myself.  I have nerve damage in both inner ears.  It causes nonstop tinnitus and a slow deterioration of my hearing.  My audiologist stated that I will, most likely, reach a point where my hearing aids will no longer be sufficient and will require cochlear implants to maintain my hearing.  I have a condition which affects my senses and my balance, particularly in my vision.  The doctors are only able to give as educated guess to what the condition might be.  I have to take medicated drops in my right eye to keep the pressure from building up or, I could possibly get glaucoma.  I recently found out that my spine is out of alignment and am in rehab to get it properly aligned again.  On top of that, between a couple of my lowest lumbar vertebraes, my body did not produce enough cartilage to cushion those parts of my spine.  This is needed for proper spine health (movement, bearing body weight, and acting as a shock absorber).  I have no clue as to what future reprocussions might be.  Needless to say, physically, I have a few problems.  

In all this time, I NEVER asked God to "fix it."  Don't get me wrong, I would love to wake up tomorrow, knowing what is it like to hear normally, again.  I would love to not have to worry about pain in my lower back and neck.  I would LOVE to be able to walk down an aisle in Walmart, searching for an item, and NOT feel lightheaded.  BUT, I didn't ask God to fix it.  What I do ask God for, constantly, is to help me get through it.  Help me prepare IF these things progress to more problematic situations.  Guide me through and to allow me to continue moving forward, regardless of my physical condition.  If I become crippled, will I find another way to go hiking and fishing?  Yes!  Do I still go shopping with my wife?  Certainly!  If I should lose my hearing, will I still be able to communicate with my family and friends?  Of course!  My sweet wife, Megan, is already putting possible solutions in her mind.  She's not going to let me give up if things go south.  God won't either!

The thing is, God has things for me to do.  Should my physical condition prevent that?  NO!  Why?  God will use me in the most effective way that I can be to His service.  In comparison, my condition is rather small.  Anyone familiar with the evangelist, Nick Vujicic?  If not, I won't explain.  Just look him up.  He is a prime example of: "God use me!  My trust and faith is in You!  YOU will show me the way!"

Are you allowing God to use you in the way that He has planned?  Or, are you resisting, so certain that YOU determine and control the path you are walking?  

Think about it.

Happiness Is...

"Then our mouth was filled with laughter, and our tongue with joyful shouting; then they said among the nations, 'The Lord has done great things for them.' "   - Psalm 126:2

What is happiness to you?  For me, there are numerous things that make me happy: the smile on my wife's face, my baby's laughter, my stepson's feeling of accomplishment at school, sipping coffee in the sunrise, hearing the birds sing, the sound of a rushing brook.  The list goes on and on.  What about you?  What are some things that make you happy?

Thing about those things and ask yourself another question:  How often do you allow some negative factor to steal that happiness?  If you are a human being, and you are, then I suspect the answer is: Quite often!

If you recall the first few verses of Ecclesiastes, chapter 3, we are instructed that there is a "time for everything".  This includes laughter (Ecc. 3:4).  The reason for the passages is to remind us that one should not replace the other.  Don't replace happy moments with negative emotions.  Don't replace work time for goofing off.  Don't replace love for hatred.  Don't replace discipline for laziness.  All these things are important and have their places within our lives.  No need for one to push another aside.

Take a moment, in the middle of a stressful day and list a few things that make you happy.  Cherish those things and, above all, cherish the Creator that has enriched your lives (and mine) with so many blessings of happiness!

Humble Yourself

 "Therefore, as the chosen of God, holy and compassionate, put on the clothes of mercifulness, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering". Colossians 3:12

How often have you questioned your self-worth?  I know I have and I would venture to say that every person has and more than once.  Hey, we are humans after all.  We have flawed characters.  We don’t like to fail, and we can be our own worst critics.  While we can certainly seek family and friends to confirm our worth, God wants us to look inside our own hearts and find the truth for ourselves.  Life certainly put me in a different-than-normal circumstance.  For medical reasons, I stay at home; slowly working to build a business.  While my wife heads to her office every morning, I stay home to take care of our baby daughter.  I grew up with the “understanding” that the man, as head of the household, was primarily responsible for making the income; regardless, if the wife chose to work or not.  So, have I fought my ego and pride over this?  You bet I have!  I felt that I was failing a big responsibility and letting down my family in the process.  It was a very unhealthy feeling.  My wife constantly assured me that there was no reason for me to feel that way.  Still, I fought it.  I did try to reason with myself the pros of my situation.  

However, it didn’t fully hit me until one day, while I was giving my daughter her mid-morning bottle that she stared deeply into my eyes.  In her eyes, it hit me.  She was pulling out that part of me that I needed to see.  She needed me to be home with her.  She relies on me to feed her, change her, cuddle her, and give her all my affection.  I couldn’t do this if I was working.  My situation has allowed my wife to continue a very prosperous career, at something that she is truly passionate about.  It has also given me a unique life that most fathers miss.  

I won’t lie and say that it’s easy.  Mothers have naturally nurturing instincts within them.  This gives them a huge advantage taking care of kids, on their own.  I’m behind on the learning curve, so to speak.  I wouldn’t change it, though.  How much greater will my worth be, gaining this new understanding and connection that comes with so much time parenting?  

On the flip side, the time away from our daughter is not easy on my wife.  There are gains and sacrifices on both sides.  The both of us have adjustments to our roles.  We make mistakes.  We get stressed.  We learn.  Things don’t always turn out exactly the way we plan, the first time we try them.  I’ll admit, my stubbornness tends to cause more of the issues.  I try to convince myself that I can naturally do the things that my wife’s psyche already contains.  Put it this way:  It would be like coming to a point on the hiking trail that a rock face stands in the way.  The two ways to move forward would be to climb it or go around.  What do I tend to do?  “I can climb this.  I’ve seen it on T.V.  I KNOW I can do this!”  That’s the moment when it would be appropriate for someone to ask, “Are you stupid?”  God says “Take the way that you are already prepared for.  The other will come in time…and practice.”  So, the best for me is to swallow my pride and accept what limits I have, staying open to learning more.  

Does this situation sound familiar to anyone else?  If so, let me depart with one final thought.   As James 4:6 says, we need to “...resist the proud and give and be humble."  Only then will our we be truly successful in every experience we encounter. 

In My Baby’s Eyes

“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.  My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.  Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”  Psalm 139:13-16

She locks her eyes to mine and just holds that unbroken gaze for what feels like an eternity.  I can’t turn away from it, nor do I choose to.  I am being read; analyzed in a very simplistic manner.  I feel that the pages of my life, revealed behind my eyes, are being studied.  I am an open book, vulnerable to scrutiny. 

What I am referring to are the moments that I hold my baby girl in my arms and she fixes her eyes to mine.  She has a deep look when that happens.  She doesn’t look away and hardly blinks.  The connection is established, and it is fixed.  Typically, they end with her giving me a heart-warming smile, as if she was saying that she found what she was searching for inside me.  Those are my favorite moments with her.  A form of communication and connection that needs no words or explanation.  It just is.

When I reflect on these moments, the words that the Psalmist wrote rings loudly to me.  However, I am not relating them to how our heavenly Father created this wonderful little girl; rather, it is how God created me.  I often wonder about how my role as a daddy will unfold but, God already knows.  It is how he stitched me together while I was still being formed.  It is the very fabric that I feel my daughter looks for when she looks deeply into my eyes.  How simple and beautiful is the mind of a little baby.  As simple as it is, she seems to find the complex answers inside of me.  Any parent that has experienced this bonding moment with their own children, may agree. There is something deeper going on.  A search for security, strength, and assurance that we (as parents) are going to give them the best of us that we can.  When my little girl finally shows that big, happy grin it is as if she is saying, “There!  I found it inside you, Daddy!”  I feel that, in some way, she knows how I will be as a parent better than I know, myself.  What an amazing feeling of assurance that it gives me!

The trail of life that I am traveling, has changed in the challenges that lie ahead.  God continues to provide all the supplies, knowledge, and expertise I need to face these challenges of parenthood that are in my (and my wife’s) future.  I don’t know how every challenge will be met, or what the results will be; though God does.  I do know that I look forward to every step that lies ahead!  How wonderfully mysterious God can be, utilizing my little baby to inspire me to venture forward into the unknown, to take on whatever God has prepared for me.  I ask God to continue to guide me, that I may be able to lead my family with the confidence and wisdom that He expects out of me...and that He had already created in me.

An Open Heart

"Greet one another with a holy kiss. The churches of Christ welcome you." Romans 16:16

The verse that decorated the sides of my old congregation's bus.  Being so young, my first thoughts were:  "What? Are we suppose to go around kissing everyone?  I don't get it."

In truth, what this simple verse was saying, the motto that my congregation was trying to display was this: Greet everyone with a friendly smile and a kind word. What better time of year to remember this simple thought?

This Christmas has been filled with a collection of “firsts” for me with the birth of my daughter.  Watching my wife and daughter, both sleeping soundly.  Holding my little girl on my chest and feeling her tiny breaths.  Looking into her curious blue eyes as she tries to put focus in this new world.  The feelings they bring are beyond words.  This is a new world of warmth and peace for me.  Before Christmas, last year, I was blessed in the sanction of marriage.  Now, this year I’m holding my little baby.  It is a warm blanket that wraps around me that even the coldest Colorado days cannot break through.  It is easy to assume that everyone is experiencing something of this kind as Christmas Eve rolls on.  However, I know that isn’t reality. 

Many military mothers and fathers are unable to hold their babies against them and watch them sleep.  Many spouses will not be sharing a kiss under the mistletoe.  Many parents will not be able to watch their kids tear into their presents Christmas morning.  That is only a fraction of people that will be experiencing heartache this Christmas.

Whether you know people personally or not, here’s a few suggestions that we could take to heart:  Be kind to everyone you encounter.  Give a warm smile and kind words to that worker at the drive-thru window of your favorite fast food restaurant.  They may be working hard for a few extra dollars to spend on the family’s Christmas dinner.  Thank that cashier at the Walmart checkout, even if they struggle with your purchase.  They may be near the end of a very long shift, and having to work on Christmas Eve and Christmas day.  Visit a friend that is missing family.  Better yet, invite them to dinner.  Little acts of kindness can carry a lot of weight.

May everyone find a bit of peace and joy this Christmas!